SELF ESTEEM ACTIVITIES

Ginger Girl Susie Story Josephine Doll
 
GINGER GIRL

Give each girl (or team) a sheet with a picture of “Ginger” (For sample Click Here - print 2 to a page)  As you
            read, you tell the girls to rip a piece of ginger off every time you think someone has hurt her feelings.

Tues. Sept 3 Next week school starts. I can't wait.  Since we moved into our new neighborhood, I haven't met
            any girls my age. Mommy says that I'll meet lots of new girls at school.

Mon. Sept 9 Today was my first day at my new school. I was scared. Nobody talked to me and I didn't know anybody.  The teacher told us to tell about our summer

vacations.  I didn't say anything and she got mad at me.   She said that everyone had to share.  I didn't want to tell them about the divorce.  Mommy said I didn't have to tell anybody if I didn't want to.  If mommy and daddy were still married, we would still be living in Texas.  I wish I could go back to Texas.  I hate my new school.

Wed. Sept. 11 I made a friend today.   Her name is Marcie.  She said I could sit next to her at lunch.

Thurs. Sept 12 The bus driver yelled at me today.  He said that he wouldn't wait for me and that I should be on time for the bus.  He said, "Doesn't your family teach you anything?"  I also heard him say under his breath, "Those kids are all the same."  Who are those kids?  Did he mean me?

Mon. Sept 23 I haven't written for a long time now. I made another friend. Her name is Lucille.  But, Marcie got mad at me at recess and said that if I didn't play with just her she wasn't going to be my friend anymore. She said she doesn't play with kids like Lucille.  She said that I was dumb and probably didn't move from Texas but that I probably was lift back.  She called me stupid.  I think she's dumb. I don't ever want to talk to her again.

Wed Sept 25 I wanted to play football with the kids in the park yesterday.  Mommy says that I should try to make new friends, but my sitter said that I couldn't play with the other kids.  She said that football was for boys and I was crazy if I wanted to play with them.  She said that girls shouldn't play sports like football.  Then she took me to the playground equipment to play, but there were only babies there.  I want to tell mommy, but she likes my sitter so much.  She'll just get mad if I tell her.

Mon Oct 7 Mommy said that we would go shopping for some new gym shoes.  The kids have been laughing at my old shoes.  Everyone else has brand new high tops.  I wish I had high tops, the kind with velcro.  Why are they laughing at my shoes?  I wish I didn't have to go to gym class.

Tues Oct 15 everyone is planning their outfits for Halloween.  I want to be a bag of jelly beans.  I saw the costume once. You get inside a big clear garbage bag and then fill it with different color balloons.  It's really neat.

Wed Oct 16 I told Marcie about my idea for a costume.  She said that it fit me--a big fat bag of jelly beans.  She said that maybe I could just wear it all the time since it suited me so well.  I told her that I wasn't fat and then she said that I should look in the mirror more often. Now, I don't know what to wear.  Everyone will laugh at me if I go as a bag of jelly beans.  Maybe I should just stay at home.

Thurs Oct 17 I still don't have an idea for a costume but mommy says I shouldn't listen to those other girls.  Mommy said she would help me make a good costume.

Mon Oct 21 Halloween is almost here.  I think I finally got a good idea for a costume

and mommy says that it would be easy to make and not cost a lot of money.  I think I'm going to be a waitress.  Like Brenda, the character I saw on that TV show that I like.

Wed Oct 22 Marcie said that a waitress costume suited me fine.  What did she mean?  I don't think she was complimenting me, but I don't know.  Because I told her about getting the idea from the TV show, she didn't say anything else. What did she mean?  Should I ask mommy?  I think mommy's getting tired of my problems.  Mommy is always so tired.  I wish mommy could be with me all the time.

Fri Nov 1 we had our Halloween party at school.  It was fun, but everyone kept teasing me today about taking their orders.  They said that I could be their slave. I wish they hadn't said that.  I got lots of candy last night.  Mommy said I have to keep it in the refrigerator and only have one piece a day.  The best part of Halloween was trick or treating.

 Discussion Questions

1. What things on the list can not be changed? These represent factors in ginger's life that may affect how she is as a person, but they are not directly within her control. (example.  The divorce) 

2.  What things on the list can be changed, influenced or modified? How could these things be changed?  Who can help change them? What can you do to help? 

3. What skills can ginger develop so she is better able to deal with these challenges? 

4. What about Marcie?  What might be causing her negative perspective? What is the personal cost to her of her attitudes and actions?  

5. How can the Girl Scout experience contribute to improving ginger's situation and outlook?  Can it also help Marcie?  What strategies would you use in each case?

By Martha A. Adler, adapted with permission from the Citizen's Alliance
to Uphold Special Education in Lansing, Mich 1991

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SUSIE STORY
For dealing with cliques and the one girl that no one wants to spend time with. This exercise will "sensitize" them to the problem. First,  make a paper doll about 2 feet tall and color her. Then, as you tell the story, wherever it says RIP, you will rip off a piece of the doll, starting with one elbow, then the next, then the knees, etc.  In the second half of the story you tape her back together again.

Let me introduce you to a girl named Susie.  Susie is an ordinary girl, just like you.  There are things she likes and doesn't like, just like you.  There are things that she is good at doing and things that she's not so good at.

She has friends and a family, just like you.

When people are nice to Susie, she's happy, and when they're not, it hurts her feelings.  There is one very special thing about Susie though - when you hurt her feelings, you can actually see that she's hurt.

Let's listen to a story about one day in Susie's life:

Our story starts on a school day, when Susie's mother wakes her up for school.  Well, Susie was kind of slow to get up that morning, and her mother said "Quit being lazy and get up.  I wish you were more like your sister, she's never lazy in the morning."  And that hurt Susie's feelings.  RIP.

Well, Susie got up and got dressed, and went downstairs for breakfast. Her older sister was already eating breakfast, and she looked up when Susie came in.  She made a face and said "Are you really going to wear that shirt with those pants?  You look dorky in that."  And that hurt Susie's feelings.   RIP.

After Susie ate her breakfast, she went outside to wait for the school bus.  When it came, she got on and started to sit down next to her friend Jane.  But Jane said, "You can't sit here.  I'm saving this seat for Polly."  And that hurt Susie's feelings.   RIP.

At school that morning, Susie couldn't find her homework to turn in. She looked in her bookbag and her desk, but she couldn't find it.  Her teacher was standing by her desk, waiting for her to find it, and in front of the whole class, her teacher said, "You are so disorganized.  I think you'd lose
your head if it wasn't attached."  RIP.

Finally, it was time for recess.  Susie loved recess.  On the playground, some of her friends were organizing a game of kickball. Susie wanted to play, but the captain of the first team said "I don't
want you on my team.  You run too slow."  RIP.  The captain of the other team said, "I don't want her either.  She can't even kick."  RIP.  And another kid said, "Why don't you go play with somebody else?"   RIP. And the other kids laughed.   RIP.

Well, Susie had had a rough day, so she just sat on the playground and cried  After a minute, the other kids noticed how hurt she was, and they said, "Oh, no!  Look what we've done!"

So they tried to make Susie feel better.

"It's OK, Susie, you can be on my team," said the captain of the first team.   And that made Susie feel a little bit better.   TAPE.

"You can be on my team if you want," said the captain of the second team.  TAPE.

"We want you to play with us," said another kid.  TAPE.

"I'm sorry I laughed at you," said another.  TAPE.

Back in the classroom that afternoon, Susie's teacher complimented her on her artwork for a project the class was working on.  "You're so creative," she said.  TAPE.

On the bus that afternoon, Jane and Polly asked Susie to sit with them. So she sat with both of her friends, and they talked and laughed all the way home.  TAPE.

Later that afternoon, Susie's sister asked if Susie wanted to go to the mall with her.  Of course, she said yes, and they had a great time trying on clothes and giggling with each other.  TAPE.

And that night, when Susie went to bed, her mother gave her a hug and a kiss and said, "I'm sorry I was grouchy with you this morning.  I really do love you!"  TAPE.

And so Susie went to bed.

My question for you is this:

Does Susie look the same as this morning?

These lines are scars, they will fade over time, just like physical scars, but they may never go away.

Remember, once you've said something, you can never take it back!

    by Beth Ranado

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JOSEPHINE DOLL
Create - from a large sheet of paper (or maybe a couple of large sheets taped together) - a girl. The girl should be typical of the age group you are working with. "Dress" her with markers and/or crayons and give her a name. Take "Josephine" to the next meeting and sit her in a chair. Once the meeting begins, introduce "Josephine" to all the girls - and say something nice about "Jo" and something - not bad, but - not so nice about "Jo". The introduction could go something like this, "Girls, I want you to meet my friend Josephine. We really have a lot of fun together, except that sometimes she has REALLY BAD breath." When you say this, rip off a piece of "Jo" - and don't make it a tiny piece. Then invite the rest of the girls to come up and do the same thing. The girls are to make negative comments about "Jo". They can be about her hair, her appearance, her clothing or about her personality - it doesn't matter. Each girl as they make the negative comment (try to make sure they don't get too negative/nasty), they rip off a piece of "Jo".

Once everyone has finished with their remarks - you can even invite them to do several - you go on to the next part of the "plan". You say, "OK girls - now that we've ripped Josephine apart - let's see if we can put her back together again." If the girls actually do put "Josie" back together again, you need to point out to them that "Josie" will never be the same - that she now has "scars" that could last her a lifetime. It really gives a very powerful message to all who participate in it. It will show the girls how destructive their behavior can be. And, it should also create a bond (team building) amongst the girls. They should be able to see (you may have to facilitate a discussion about it) how their power - although in this case a negative power - can be pulled together - and that when channeled in a positive direction, they can accomplish anything!

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